No Place For Charity
by happyhooligan2001
Summary: Not content with ripping his own soul to pieces must he do the same to mine? I loved her with all my heart but she died helpless and terrified. The last thing Charity ever saw was my cold, cruel indifference. Severus Snape/Charity Burbage
1. You've Got A Friend

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 1**

**You've Got A Friend**

Charity. To love human beings in so far as they are nothing. That is to love them as God does

Simon Weil

**July 1997**

Snape didn't look directly at the woman suspended over the table, he couldn't bear to. She had been tortured beyond human endurance and was now merely a shattered wreck of the brave, intellegent woman he had known. The mental and emotional discipline he had developed over a lifetime was being strained almost beyond it's limits but it held.

"Severus please. We're friends." A last whimpering plea.

A crackle of green energy and her body dropped like a sack of potatos. She was dead before she hit the table. Her empty blue eyes stared at Severus accusingly.

He was aware that the Dark Lord was watching him. The slightest twitch, a single tear could mean his death. Not that he wouldn't welcome death at this moment but that would mean that Voldemort would win. He could never allow that to happen. Then everything Charity had worked for her entire life, everything she died for would be destroyed. The world Voldemort had planned was a dark and cruel world. It had no place for Charity.

He never even told her that he loved her.

"Dinner, Nagani."

**September, 1993**

The first thing Snape noticed about her was her smile. There was nothing really unusual about it. He'd seen smiles before. But what was unusual was that it was directed at him. "Hello! I'm Charity Burgage, the new Muggle Studies teacher." She extended her right hand.

He grasped the hand and quickly released it. "Severus Snape, Potions Master, Pleased to meet you." He didn't look or sound pleased to meet her. Snape looked her over suspiciously. Nothing particularly special about her. A small, rather average looking woman in her late twenties, blond hair, no makeup, wearing a rather dowdy looking blue dress with an ankle length skirt and a faded red wool sweater. It was just her smile that held him. As if she was really happy to be with him. No woman had ever smiled at him that way. Not since Lily did so many years ago. He gave a curt nod then turned on his heel and left.

That evening at the opening feast he had just settled into his seat when Charity appeared and pointed at the empty seat next to him. "Is someone sitting here?"

Snape glanced at the empty seat. "Obviously not." He said curtly..

She quickly pulled out the chair and sat in it. "Isn't this exciting? The start of a new school year. I can't wait to get started!"

"I'm afraid your enthusiam will soon run aground on the jagged rocks these students use for brains."

"Oh, I don't think it will be that bad."

"Perhaps not for you, Professor Burbage, Muggle studies is well known for being an easy class."

She gave him an exagerated pout. "It's a lot more complex than you think. For example, do you know how muggles make electricity?"

"Don't know, don't care." Severus stared straight ahead hoping she'll just shut up.

"They do it by spinning magnets inside a coil of wire."

"I'm sure that information will prove very useful to me some day." Severus looked down the table at Professor McGonnagal. She had just received a note by owl. She read it and quickly got to her feet and walked out of the hall.

Charity seemed somewhat curious. "Wonder what that's all about?"

"It might have something to do with the dementors surrounding the school. I assume though that it probably involves the Potter boy. He's rather fond of grandious gestures that make him the centre of attention."

Later during the meal Severus noticed Charity was just quietly picking at her food. Finally his curiousity got the better of him. "Now what's the problem?"

"It's nothing important. It's just that Professor Dumbledore announced we had two new professors. He introduced Professors Lupin and Hagrid but never even mentioned me."

Snape glanced down at Dumbledore. "Professor Dumbledore's got a lot on his mind right now. He tends to be absentminded sometimes. And trust me, around here sometimes going unnoticed is the best way to survive."

**October, 1994**

Professor Snape was sitting in his office grading papers when Charity walked in on him. Did the woman have nothing better to do than pester him? She seemed to make a hobby of it. Today she was angry.

"Professor Snape! Why did you send Dennis Creevy to the kitchen to scrub pots all night? Is it because he's Muggleborn?"

"No, it's because he called his caldron a pot. He did it four times today."

"He doesn't know any better! Besides, what difference does it make!"

Severus was getting more and more irritated. "It makes a big difference. A caldron is for making potions in. It is an important instrument for any wizard. A pot is for making soup or boiling spagetti. It is not a caldron."

Charity crossed her arms and set her jaw. "It's just a minor difference in language. Dennis grew up in a Muggle house. He doesn't know all the terms yet."

Snape stood up. He towered over Charity. "Then it's about time he learned! Language is very important for wizards. Our spells are words. Our potion ingrediants are words. The wrong word can get him killed. Being muggleborn is no excuse!" He waved his hand dismissivley. "I'm sure the house elves are plying him with cupcakes and tarts. He's probably having the time of his life down there. But he will learn the difference between a caldron and a pot."

Charity looked him in the eye and looked down. "Okay, I guess you're right."

"Of course I am, now if you have nothing else to whine about, I have papers to grade."

Charity glanced around the office. "Don't you ever get tired of this place?"

"It's my office."

"There's no windows."

"We're underground. Windows would be pretty useless."

Charity smiled, "Why don't you bring your papers up to my office. We could grade our papers together. My office is on the first floor, it has a nice view of the lake."

Snape didn't really want to carry all his work up all those flights of stairs. But on the other hand a change in scenery would be nice. He finally nodded and gathered his papers together.

Charity's office was pretty nice. She had the window open to admit a cool breeze off the moonlit lake. Snape sat down and pulled his parchments out of his satchel.

Charity looked out the window. "In America this would be the second floor. The ground floor would be the first floor."

"What do you know of America?"

"I have a squib cousin named Lyman who owns a small ranch in Idaho. He's also the manager of a Burger King. That's a muggle resturant. I went to stay with him for four months," She shook her head sadly. "My whole family's pureblooded. The idea of a squib in the family was so horrifying to them that they pretty much drove him out of the country."

Severus was surprised. "I assumed you were either muggleborn or half blooded. I've never met a pureblooded Muggle studies teacher."

"I decided to try to live as a muggle for two years. I've always been curious about them and how they get by withour magic. There was also a bit of teenaged rebellion thrown in. I wanted to piss off my parents. Getting sorted into Hufflepuff instead of Slytherin was bad enough. This was the last straw. They completely disowned me. So I decided to visit the other family exile. I even rode over there on a muggle airplane." She grinned. "Lyman went completely native except for the British accent. Cowboy hats, boots, pickup trucks. He's got quite a gun collection too. Those are muggle weapons where a chemical explosion propells a small piece of metal down a tube at hypersonic speeds."

"I'm completely aware of what a gun is." Severus said dryly.

"Okay, most wizards don't. I got to be quite a good shot shooting at cans and bottles. He also took me and his family on a tour of the American West. We went to Yellowstone, Yosemite, The Grand Canyon. They have huge forests over there. It was nice but it wasn't home. So I came back and got a job as a gardener for the city of Birmingham." She shook her head. "It's a lot of work doing things the muggle way but you get used to it. After a couple of years I'd had enough and went back to being a witch. But my family still wouldn't even talk to me. Gringotts hired me. They do quite a bit of work with muggle banks that the muggle banks aren't even aware of. It was steady work but boring. I was delighted when Professor Dumbledore offered me this job."

She pulled out a parchment and began grading it. "So, enough about me. What's your story?"

"I don't have a story." Severus said. He was marking one of Granger's papers. It was so perfect that it was annoying him.

"Yes, you do, I can sense it. You've been hurt. You've been hurt so many times that you don't even know how to be happy. You're also lonely. You crave friendship but you don't know how to be a friend."

"I don't need any friends!"

"Well, it's too late. You've got one."


	2. Last Dance

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 2**

**Last Dance**

**December, 1994**

* * *

><p>Snape stood alone in his very uncomfortable dress robes watching the Yule Ball. His ears were assaulted by the unholy racket that the Weird Sisters laughing referred to as music. Nearly everyone in the room avoided him which suited him just fine. Well not everyone, he gave a mental sigh when Igor Karkaroff approached him. No doubt for more fearful blabbering.<p>

"We need to talk." Igor whispered.

"Then talk."

"Outside, in private."

Severus mentally contemplated whether he preferred Igor's cowardly whining or another hideous song by the Weird Sisters. He chose the former. It would be nice to get some fresh air. He gave a small nod and strode out of the Hall, Igor hurrying along behind him.

The rose garden was protected by multiple spells from the harsh Scottish winter. The bushes were lush and in bloom. The statues stood white in the moonlight. Couples were sitting together on the stone benches. Outside the garden a thick winter's snow lay across the grounds. Outside the castle the racket of the Weird Sisters could still be heard but at a bearable volume.

"Severus, the signs are out there. The Dark Lord will return." Karkaroff whispered.

"Oh really? I had completely forgotten that since the last six times you've told me. I believe your fears are exagerated." Snape heard some rustling and giggling from behind some bushes. He blasted the bushes with his wand and two students came tumbling out. "Get back into the castle! Twenty points from Gryffindor!"

"But what if he does come back?" Igor whined.

"Then we fight him. That's all we can do. The Dark Lord doesn't tolerate traitors."

"We'll die!"

"Then we'll die. I know you didn't testify to the Ministry over any great concern for your fellow man. You just wanted to get out of Azkaban. If you die then be content that for one time in your miserable life you did the right thing."

"We can flee, the two of us. Somewhere he can't find us."

"You're getting all worked up over nothing, I don't see what there is to fuss about Igor." Snape blew another rosebush apart.

"Severus, you cannot pretend this isn't happening!" Igor said in a hushed voice. It's been getting clearer and clearer for months. I am being seriously concerned, I can't deny it . . "

"Then flee," Snape said curtly. "Flee, I will make your excuses. I, however, am remaining at Hogwarts."

They walked around a corner and Severus blasted another rosebush. "Ten points from Ravenclaw, Fawcett!" He snarled at a girl rushing past him. "And ten points from Hufflepuff too, Stebbins!" as a boy rushed after her. He then spotted Potter and Weasley on the walk eavesdropping on him. "And what are you two doing!" he snarled.

"We're walking," Ron said. "Not against the law is it?"

"Keep walking then!" Severus brushed past them while Igor scampered after him.

"Severus, it isn't safe here, nowhere's safe."

Severus was starting to reconsider his decision to come out in the garden with Igor, he could endure the Weird Sisters much better than this coward's constant yammering. "If he comes it won't be tonight!" Severus snarled. "Go hide in your chambers! I'm getting tired of your voice!"

As Igor left Snape turned on his heel only to find Charity Burbage standing behind him. She was wearing a green velvet dress might have been fashionable eighty years ago. No jewelry except for a small pearl necklace, and her blond hair tied up in a bun. "A meeting of the Ex-Deatheaters Club?" she asked with a smile.

"I won't have that part of my life joked about!" Severus growled.

"Touchy, touchy, okay, no more jokes." She looked at Karkaroff as he disappeared into the castle. "What did he want?"

"Igor Karkaroff is afraid You-Know-Who is returning. He's a coward. His strategy for his entire life has been to figure out which side is winning and join it. If You-Know-Who returns he will have run out of sides.

"He can stay here. Professor Dumbledore will protect him."

"I don't think he'll stay anywhere where his location is known."

"Well, enough talk about You-Know-Who. It's too nice out here to be thinking of such dreadful things." She held her arms out and spun in a circle. "Isn't it wonderful to see the rose bushes blooming in the middle of winter!"

"One of Albus's sentimental and foolish ideas, if we don't keep the students out of these bushes we'll have to open a daycare center next year for all their squalling brats!"

Charity frowned at him. "I think we can trust our students better than that."

"I beg to disagree," he blasted two Slytherins from some bushes. "Five points from Slytherin!" He watched the couple race back inside.

Charity held out her hand. "Severus, may I have this dance?"

"I don't dance."

"Neither do I. I've never danced before. But I'd like to try it. Please?" She pouted "You're not going to make me chase after Igor are you? He's not my type. Gloomy ex-deatheater, distrusted by most of his collegues, feared by his students, no sense of humor. Definetly not my type."

Charity grinned "Ha! Made you smile! Not much of a smile. Kind of pathetic really, more of a gimace. But still a little smile. Now will you dance with me?"

"I'm not going to prance around in front of the students like a jackass!"

"Look around you, there are no students left. You've scared them all away." She grasped his right hand and drew him close. Severus now had the completely unfamiliar feeling of a woman's body against his. He was tall enough to rest his chin on the top of her head. For the past few months he'd spent a lot of time with her grading papers in her office, sitting next to her at meals. But this was the first time they had actually touched since their first meeting.

Charity had her eyes closed and was softly whispering "One, two, three, one two three," as they shuffled around the garden. Neither one of them really knew how to dance. Charity's body wasn't exactly curvy but it still felt very feminine. Snape could feel his blood stir and an odd but pleasant sensation in his chest. He inhaled deeply and picked up the faint smell of soap. It was quite a relief from the chaotic mixture of perfumes, lotions and colognes that the students had basted themselves in before crowding into the Great Hall. Snape lost himself in the moment. The Weird Sisters weren't such a bad band, they were actually pretty good. The moon was shining brightly and the stars looked like glittering diamonds. He'd never appreaciated how beautiful they were before. Keeping this garden lush and warm was a brilliant idea. He felt a powerful urge to keep his arms around this small woman and protect her from the horrors of the world.

Eventually the music stopped but they still stood in the garden clinging to each other. After a moment Charity gently pushed Severus away. "It's midnight. Time to chase everyone home for the night.

Severus wanted to take her back into arms but he held back. Once before he had mistaken kindness and friendship for love. An understandable mistake since it had been the first time in his life he had encountered any of the three. He will never make that mistake again. He gave Charity a brief bow then turned and strode back into the entrance hall.

* * *

><p>Authors note: A few lines of dialogue were copied verbatem from Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire. I appologize but it was unavoidable. I also assumed the garden was magically protected. I've never spent a winter in Scotland but I don't think that in December rose bushes would provide much concealment or that a garden in the middle of the night would be a good place for a tryst.<p> 


	3. A Good Spy

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 3**

**A Good Spy**

**August, 1995**

* * *

><p>A thick fog lay over the London street as Severus Snape strode though the night with a large cloth shopping bag clutched in his left hand. It was only an hour after sunset and the streets were crowded with muggles going about their muggle ways. The headlamps of the muggle automobiles created cone shaped beams of light in the fog while the streetlamps all had round halos. Severus glance up at a streetsign to catch his bearings when he felt it. The warm summer's night had suddenly gotten chilly. He shivered slightly in the cold. No, it couldn't be. Two large cloaked figures gliding down the sidewalk. Even the muggles sensed something was wrong. Dementors! What were dementors doing outside of Azkaban!<p>

He dropped the bag and his hand insinctively reached inside his sleeve for his wand then stopped. Too many muggles around! He squeezed his eyes shut.

"_We hereby pledge our lives, bodies, property and souls eternally to your service Master!" Snape and two others were kneeling in front of a handsome, dark haired man. Each one was holding his right arm out palm up. Lord Voldemort seemed to glide toward them. _

"_I accept your pledge and will give each of you a gift in return. A sign of your eternal loyalty to me." He touched each of their forearms in turn. A white hot agony raced through Severus's arm as the Dark Mark was seared into it. How could he have ever been so foolish? So blind with jealousy and hatred? _

_He was standing alone in a shattered empty house. The Aurors had left hours ago. The bodies were gone. This was where she died. This was where he betrayed and murdered the only woman he had ever loved. His anguish was unbearable. He leaned against a blackened, scorched wall. Tears rolled unnoticed down his cheeks as he stood there weeping._

"Severus! Severus! Open your eyes! Look at me!" Severus opened his eyes and focused on Charity's pleasantly plain face. What was she doing here? She looked pretty distressed too. She threw her arms around him and kissed him on the lips. Snapes arms went instinctively around her and held her close. He could feel the warmth of her body. The small breasts pressed against his chest. Her soft arms hugging him tightly. The unhappiness seemed to drain from his body. He could feel warmth, happiness, and love. He was thirty five years old. It was his first kiss.

Charity broke the kiss. "Grab your bag and follow me! That just helps with the symptoms. The dementors are still here!" She grabbed his right hand and dragged him down a nearby street. Twice she pressed him against a wall and gave him another kiss. Then she led him into a block of flats that had to be at least a century old. They went up two flights of stairs and her fingers fumbled with the keys as she she tried to open the door. Severus tapped the door with his wand and it flew open. They tumbled inside and Charity slammed the door shut. _"Expecto Patronum!"_

"_Expecto Patronum!" _When Snape tried to think of a happy thought, all he could think of was Charity's kiss. His doe patronus covered the window and he turned to see Charity's. "A chimpanzee? Really?"

"Your's is a doe, what's the story about that?

"That's a long story and not one that's any of your business." Snape said curtly. He looked around the small flat curiously It was cluttered with muggle technology, bookshelves stuffed with books and stacks of old magazines and newspapers. "Do you actually live here?"

"When schools out I do. None of this stuff works in a magical community and I have to keep up with all this stuff if I'm going to teach muggle studies." She glanced down and her face coloured. "I must appologise. I don't normally run around snogging men like that. It's just that I'd heard of the technique somewhere and we couldn't use spells with all the muggles around. Besides, you looked like a man who could use a kiss."

"It's quite all right." Snape said sternly. "I've heard of the technique too. I never thought it was practical."

"I didn't even think of getting a breath mint first."

"I said it was quite all right. We can stay here for a while. The dementors won't stay long."

"What are dementors doing outside of Azkaban? I don't understand." Charity was pacing the floor. A worried look on her face.

"Probably sent by a Death Eater in the Ministry."

"There can't be Death Eaters in the Ministry!"

"There are Death Eaters everywhere. I'm not exactly popular with them."

"No, I guess not." Charity looked at Severus curiously. "So what were you doing wandering around in a muggle neighborhood?"

"There are certain mundane ingredients that I use for potions. Ginger, cloves, coconut oil, things like that. I discovered that muggle stores charge far less than the thieves in Diaganon Alley. I have also developed a fondness for tinned soup." Snape picked up a small object covered with buttons. "What is this?"

"It's a calculator. It does mathmatical calculations. You can try it out if you like."

Severus put it down. "I see, and this thing?" He gestured at a large box with a dark grey screen covered with glass."

"That's called a television. It shows moving pictures and sounds transmitted from miles away."

"How does it work?"

"I have no idea. Something to do with electricity." Charity grinned. "We can watch a muggle movie while we're waiting! I'll pop some popcorn!" She rushed into the small kitchen. "Muggles like to eat popcorn while watching movies."

"Why?"

"I don't know, they just do. Oh! And some iced tea with lemon in it. That's how they drink it in America. It's pretty refreshing on a hot day." While Charity bustled around in the kitchen, Snape looked around at the various items scattered around and examined some of the books on the shelves.

Charity came out of the kitchen with a large bowl of popcorn then went back for the pitcher of iced tea. She then turned on the electric television and pulled a small object out of a box which she placed in another machine. She then joined Severus on the sofa as the movie started.

Severus thought the plot of the movie was ridiculous, but he did enjoy the popcorn, the tea, and especially presence of Charity next to him on the sofa.

"So, Severus, what do you think of the movie?" Charity asked part way though.

"This James Bond character is not a very good spy. He's not fooling anyone. Everybody knows he's a spy including his enemies. His pitiful attempts at disguise are seen through in just a few minutes. He basically just wanders around waiting for people to try to kill him and for vital information to just fall into his lap." Snape shook his head. "A good spy works to win the friendship and trust of some person or organization. When he wins their trust, he betrays that trust and destroys the people who trusted him. A good spy is ultimately a traitor."

"That's pretty dark. These movies are pretty popular. People just like the light hearted action and adventure." Charity was looking at him oddly. He decided not to say anymore. He probably said too much already.

The movie had ended quite a while ago but Severus sat perfectly still on the sofa. Charity had fallen asleep and her head was resting on his shoulder. Her body cradled in his left arm. He could feel the warmth of her body, her breathing, the softness of her flannel shirt. The television screen was completely blank. His left arm was devoloping a painful cramp but he still didn't move. Charity had a rattling nasal snore. A trickle of drool oozed from the corner of her mouth onto the front of his robe but he still didn't move. This moment was magical. He wanted it to last forever.


	4. Extinction

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 4**

**Extinction**

**October, 1995**

With a pop Severus Snape apparated in the woods a good distance from the castle. He had just met with The Dark Lord and gave him some vital information. Of course it was only what Professor Dumbledore approved of. The information might cause some innocent people to suffer but that was the price of doing business. The game he was playing was extremely dangerous. The Dark Lord seemed to get more and more unpredictable. Snape never knew when any meeting with him would be his last.

It was well past midnight. There were strange sounds in the forest. Rustling, soft growls, an owl hooted. Snape ignored them as he strode toward the castle, wand in hand. The predators seemed to avoid him. They sensed one of their own among them. _'Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I shall fear no evil, for I am the most evil son-of-a-bitch in the entire valley.'_ The castle now loomed ahead of him on the hilltop. Most of the windows were darkened but his brow furrowed in curiousity when he noticed Professor Burbage's classrom was brightly lit. He saw some movement in there. What was she doing up this late?

He pushed open her classroom door without knocking. Charity was dressed in a quilted blue and white checked full length nightgown with a black wool cap on her head. Her bare feet were propped up on her desk with a pair of discarded slippers on the floor. At the moment she was frowning at her chalkboard where an animated piece of chalk was scribbling equations. She glanced up as Snape walked in unannounced. "Hi Severus, you're up late."

"So are you."

"I couldn't sleep. Something that's been bothering me for a long time. Are you an only child?"

Snaped bristled. His family life was a sore point with him. "My private life is none of your business, Professor!"

"Actually, tonight it's very much my business. So let me ask you again. Severus, please, are you an only child?"

Severus stared at her for a moment. "Yes."

"So am I, about how many of our students would you say were only children?"

Severus thought for a moment. The Potter boy of course, Luna Lovegood, Draco Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle, Neville Longbottom, Hermoine Granger, the list went on and on.

Charity continued, "Would you say half? More than half?"

"Yes."

"I thought so too, the situation's getting critical. Our race is facing extinction."

"Extinction?" Snape stared at the chalkboard trying to make sense of the figures.

"An only child, that's two wizards creating one wizard. Our population's shrinking. Even the number of muggle born wizards have declined. Have you noticed how many of the old wizarding families are extinct now? In just the past couple of years the Black family has been reduced to one fugitive and the Crouch family has disappeared. The Dumbledore family has been reduced to only two elderly men. Nobody wants to have children anymore. But that's only one symptom. Did you have a happy childhood?"

Snape glared angrily at her but she just gave him a tight lipped smile. "I didn't think so. Neither one of us would be as screwed up as we were if we had good childhoods." Her smile disappeared and she stared at the floor. "My parents disowned me just because I wanted to play muggle for a little while. I was their only child. They would have taken my last name away if there was some legal way to do it. I've tried meeting them, sent them letters. But not one word in ten years. What kind of people would do something like that to their own daughter? And they're not the only ones. Barty Crouch was killed by his own son. The whole concept of family is breaking down."

"Shouldn't we alert the Ministry?"

Charity made an extremely rude noise with her mouth. "If I know about it, the Ministry knows about it. They're more concerned with the next election than the next generation. Unpleasant truths tend to make people distrust their leaders." She shook her head. "A civil war amongst a dying population is catastrophic. It will only accelerate the process. If we win we'll have to lock up any surviving Death Eaters in Azkaban effectively removing them from the gene pool. If You-Know-Who wins then he has his own ways of removing people from the gene pool. No matter who wins the entire race loses. Of course you could make the argument that any race as stupid as ours deserves to be extinct. Maybe evolution decided to make two different kinds of people but only one comes out in the end. The Neanderthals disappeared and the world went on without them." She stared at the chalk board. "I'd give us about another 150 years without the war. If You-Know-Who wins it will be much quicker."

Snape walked over next to her. "There's always the Weasleys."

Charity grinned. "Yes, the Weasleys, the exception to the rule. They don't turn inward like most pure bloods. They accept everybody and they love each other. They sometimes drive each other crazy but they do love each other. They can set an example for the rest of us. I would hate for the entire fate of the Wizard world to have to rest on the well used uterus of Molly Weasley but it might have to come to that. Large families should be encouraged."

She picked up a ruler and shoved it down the back of her nightgown to scratch her back. "I think I'll recommend that Professor Dumbledore hire Mrs. Weasely to teach a class on family and parenting. We turn out students who can turn mice into teacups but how many can turn a baby into a productive citizen?" She set the ruler aside. "There's also the problem of inbreeding. Especially among the pure bloods. Recessive genes crop up, sickly children, batshit craziness, it may be one reason why the pure blood families are declining."

Severus pondered that. He had just returned from a meeting where batshit craziness was the norm. "So, you're saying the whole race is doomed."

"Not necessarily. There might be a way out of it." She waved her hand and erased the blackboard. Then the piece of chalk drew two stick figures, one had on a triangular wizard's hat, the other had a witch's hat and a triangle for a dress. "Let's say that Wally Wizard marries Wanda Witch." The two figures embraced and kissed. "Now lets say they have two children." Two smaller stick figures popped up. "You might think that would be replacement numbers but you would be wrong. Not all children reproduce. Our numbers would still decline. They would need at least three." A third small stick figure appeared. "This creates stagnation. The numbers remain the same. No increase or decrease." Two magical people creating three."

She then moved the stick figures to the side of the board and created four more stick figures two with the hats and two without. "Now suppose William Wizard marries Mary Muggle and Wilemina Witch marries Mike Muggle." The new stick figures embraced and kissed. "Now practically all children from mixed marriages are magical. If they each have three children." The smaller stick figures appeared. "That would be two magical people creating six. Well above replacement rates. Intermarriage with muggles could prove to be the salvation of our race!"

Severus stared at the blackboard. "So you would force us all to marry muggles!" He himself was a product of a mixed marriage and his memories of his father weren't pleasant ones.

Charity snorted in derision. "No, I wouldn't force anybody to marry anyone. I'm still a big believer in individual liberty. People should be allowed to marry whoever they want and have as many children as they please. Forcing my beliefs on others would make me as bad as You-Know-Who. But intermarriage should be encouraged or at least not actively discouraged. Just like large families should be encouraged but not forced. I plan on presenting it as an option to my students. Something that they shouldn't rule completely out."

Severus looked at the young woman studying the blackboard. He couldn't imagine a better mother, a better wife than Charity Burbage. He imagined the two of them living together at Spinner's End surrounded by children. Her mothering skills should make up for any shortcomings he might have as a father. He longed to tell her how he felt about her. A chance to love someone. To fill the aching void of loneliness that had filled him for his entire life.

But he didn't. He kept his stone faced mask on. It was a nice fantasy but that was all it would ever be. He was walking a razor's edge. The foolish choices he'd made as a youth put him on the path he was on and he must travel it alone to the bitter end. He knew that there would be no happy ending for him. Not that he deserved one.

"Don't mention these ideas to anyone. They could put you at serious risk. The idea of cross breeding will drive the Death Eaters into a frenzy. Wait until things get better."

"'Till things get better! When are things ever going to get better!" She stood up and glared angrily up his nostrils, her arms crossed defiantly. "Our race is dying! We can't afford to wait for things to get better! Every year the situation gets worse! If we let the Death Eaters tell us how to live our lives then they've already won! We have to stand up to them. There aren't any civilians in this fight!"

Snape could see the determination in her face. There wasn't any way he was going to change her mind. He just hoped that she would be below the Dark Lord's notice. "Just be careful Professor Bubage. And remember what I told you the first day you were here. Around here sometimes going unnoticed is the best way to survive."


	5. Traitor

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 4**

**Traitor**

* * *

><p><strong>October, 1995<strong>

Professor Snape glided silently through the classroom as the students were putting their finishing touches on their potions. It was a simple potion to cure minor burns. A potion that Longbottom would probably need quite a bit of over his lifetime. His keen ears picked up a whispered conversation. It was Malfoy whispering to Goyle, one of his pet goons. Snape stepped closer to remind the boy to concentrate on his work when a whispered line brought him up short. "We won't have Burbage around much longer, not after the High Inquisitor sends her report in." Snape paused to listen further but Goyle had noticed his approach and poked Malfoy gently in the rib. Malfoy glanced up and quickly returned to his assignment.

After class when the students were leaving Severus called out, "Malfoy, I would like a word with you." The boy nodded to his two companions to go on out and approached Professor Snape's desk.

"I understand you were in the Muggle Studies class when Professor Umbridge examined it. I wasn't aware that you took that class."

"I'm just taking it to report to my father about the educational standards around here."

"So it's not just because you think it's an easy class?"

"Of course not. My father says . . ."

"If I want to know what your father says I'll ask him."

"Okay, but Burbage . . ."

"Professor Burbage!"

"Professor Burbage is always talking about Muggles, it's always Muggle this and Muggle that!"

"A Muggle studies professor who talks about Muggles? How shocking! I'll alert the ministry at once." Snape declared dryly. "So what happened when Professor Umbridge examined the class?"

"Well, Professor Burbage was babbling some nonsense about muggles when Professor Umbridge asked her why this school should even have a Muggle Studies class. She pointed out, quite reasonably, that the school would save quite a bit of money if they did away with the class and eliminated the Professor's position."

"How did she respond?"

"She said that all Wizards will have to deal with Muggles at some time or another. That there are a lot more Muggles in the world than there are Wizards. They might have to deal with Muggle money or know how to buy a ticket for the Underground as if any self respecting Wizard would want to ride a train through a dark tunnel with a bunch of stinky Muggles!"

"What happened then?"

"Well Professor Burbage was talking about Muggles visiting the moon when Professor Umbridge pointed out that Icarus Juno apparated on the moon way back in 1889. Professor Burbage then got all snarky and said that Neil Armstrong actually came back from the moon while Icarus Juno is still up there because he didn't understand the whole vacume thing. Like that's such a big deal!" Draco snarled. "She acts like Muggles are better than us in some ways!"

"Don't ever underestimate them. That could be a mistake."

"Well, Professor Burbage doesn't think Muggles are all that different from Wizards! She sees nothing wrong with Wizards having Muggle friends or even dating them!" Draco shivered with disgust. "When I tell my father . . ."

"Don't." Severus interupted. "Trust me, there's nothing people find more irritatating than some student complaining about his teacher. I recommend that you keep your thoughts to yourself. Words spoken in haste can never be recalled and may lead to a lifetime of regret. Now you'd better get on to your next class."

Draco left and Severus was left alone to think of Lily, of words spoken in haste and lifetimes of regret.

June, 1997

Severus gazed at Dumbledore, hatred and revulsion etched in his face.

"Severus . . . please . . ."

Snape raised his wand and pointed it directly at Dumbledore. _"Avada Kedavra!"_

Dumbledore's lifeless body was hurled out of the tower. "Out of here, quickly." Snape grabbed Draco by the scruff of the neck and pushed him down the stairs. He hurried out of the castle. There were sounds of combat behind him but he didn't stop to help his fellow Deatheaters. They could all die for all he cared.

Albus, the puppetmaster. Albus, the master manipulator. He could work anything into his intricate plans. Even his own murder. Wheels within wheels. Severus had given everything to that old man. Tonight he had given him all he had left. His honor, his good name. The truth would never come out. His name will be listed on the pantheon of traitors. Judas Iscariot, Benedict Arnold, and Severus Snape. He will be hated and despised by generations to come. Charity will hate him. He had lost her forever. The thought ripped at his heart. He only had two friends in the world and tonight he lost both of them. If he ever met Charity again it would be as mortal enemies.

His actions tonight will bring him closer to the Dark Lord. It would win him aclaim among the pathetic dregs who accompanied him. Such honors were worth less to him than a puddle of dog vomit. Yet it was the price he had to pay. How much more would he have to sacrifice!

The Potter boy is running after him, his face contorted with grief and rage. Severus would have to make sure he doesn't die. Eventually he would have die but this isn't the right time. Albus could be a cold blooded bastard when he had to be.

"DON'T CALL ME A COWARD!"

**July 1997**

Severus stood in the shadows of the dark alley. Night had fallen across the city and the streets were deserted. The Muggles were facing a wave of terror that they couldn't possibly understand. A folded copy of The Daily Prophet was in his pocket. He couldn't believe that she published the article. She was in danger now. He had to warn her.

Then he spotted her. A woman walking alone in Muggle clothing. Blond hair bound by a blue scarf. He let her walk by toward the block of flats where he had spent some of the happiest moments of his life then stepped behind her.

"Charity."

She spun around, her blue eyes wide with surprise and terror, already bringing her wand up. With a flick of his wand and barely a thought he sent it spinning off into the darkness. Severus was a master duelist, Charity; not even close.

She was trembling in terror, tears running down her cheeks. "I guess you're going to kill me now." Her voice quivered, "Get it over with."

"I'm not going to kill you Charity. I'm here to warn you. You're in grave danger! Leave! Go back to Idaho! Change your name! You can easily blend in with the Muggles, do so! Never come back!"

"So that's it? You're trying to scare me away! YOU SICK, EVIL BASTARD! YOU MURDERED HIM! A HELPLESS OLD MAN! HE TRUSTED YOU! HE THOUGHT YOU WERE HIS FRIEND!" Her face was contorted with anger, terror and grief. The tears were now flowing freely. "I THOUGHT YOU WERE A DECENT MAN! I THOUGHT IT WAS UNFAIR THE WAY THE OTHERS TREATED YOU! OH GOD! HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO BLIND! WHAT WAS IT YOU SAID! A GOOD SPY WINS THE FRIENDSHIP OF A PERSON THEN BETRAYS AND DESTROYS THEM!"

She ran up to him and started punching him with her fists. He didn't even try to stop her or even defend himself. "Charity, please! Just do what I said!"

"I THOUGHT WE COULD BE FRIENDS! MAYBE SOMETHING BETTER THAN FRIENDS! HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO STUPID!" Her punches got weaker as her body was racked with sobbing. "I HATE YOU SEVERUS! WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO BACK TO YOUR MASTER AND KISS HIS ASS! GO WORSHIP YOUR GOD!

She collapsed on the sidewalk still sobbing. Severus turned and walked away. Coming here was a mistake. He couldn't talk her in leaving.

"I HATE YOU SNAPE! GO TO HELL!"

Severus could feel the pain in his chest. He wanted to cry but couldn't. He could only hope the Dark Lord would find her beneath his notice. There would be no happiness in his life. He had no doubt that he was going to Hell, after all, he was already there.


	6. Your True Self

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 6**

**Your True Self**

* * *

><p>Charity is patient, is kind: Charity envies not, deals not perversly, is not puffed up; is not ambitious, seeks not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinks no evil, rejoices not in iniquity but rejoices in the truth. Bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things.<p>

St. Paul

1 Corinthians 13 3-7 Douray Reims version

Four Days Later

Malfoy Manor

As soon as Snape materialised outside Malfoy Manor he sensed another nearby. He immediately whipped out his wand and found himself staring down it at Yaxley, He relaxed somewhat but not entirely. He couldn't really trust anybody. Severus remained silent during the walk into the manor while Yaxley yammered something about peacocks. They were a little late but Severus had important information. What he had to tell Voldemort might cause the deaths of some members of the Order. This pained him a great deal. While none of them were actually his friends. He had no friends anymore. He didn't even particularly like any of them. He knew they despised him. But he did regard them as brothers and sisters in arms regardless of what they thought of him. But this was something that he had to do.

When he walked into the large room the first thing he saw was Charity floating upside down over the table. Her face was battered and bruised. Not only had she been Crucioed beyond human endurance, she had also been beaten. The shock struck him like a sledgehammer in the gut. His defenses almost came down but he managed to hold them. His fingers made the slightest twitch toward his wand but he managed to relax them. Charity was doomed, he couldn't save her anymore than he could save Lily or Albus. Everyone he ever loved was doomed.

"Yaxley, Snape," Voldemort called out from the head of the table. "You are very nearly late." His slitted red eyes bore into Severus's own. Severus could feel his mind and emotions being probed. It was a test, everything was a test. Albus had hoped his murder would bring Voldemort to trust him but Voldemort never really trusted anyone. He was a skilled Legilimens but not quite as good as he thought he was.

Snape had a stone wall in his mind blocking the probe but a good Occlumen always left something in front of the wall. If Voldemort couldn't sense anything he would know he was being blocked. In front of the mental wall Severus had some eagerness to share his information, surprise at finding Charity there, and a little fear. Voldemort always liked a little fear in his followers and it was usually a good idea to keep the homocidal maniac happy. Behind the wall was turmoil, anguish, sorrow, and deep burning hatred toward the evil creature who had ruined not only his life but so many others.

"Severus, here," said Voldemort indicating the seat on his right. "Yaxley-beside Dolohov."

As the meeting went on Severus tried not to look at the woman suspended above the table. He was afraid that if he did all his defenses would collapse. None of the people seated around the table looked up at Charity except for Draco who kept glancing up at her once in a while, his face drawn and pale. So the boy had made some ill-timed remarks about his Muggle Studies teacher and was now regreting the consequences of his actions. Severus couldn't bring himself to hate the boy. Draco was too much like he was when he was that age. And Albus had claimed the boy's soul wasn't entirely lost.

Voldemort had taken Lucius's wand and slowly caressed it. He pointed it at the slowly revolving woman and gave it a tiny flick. Charity awoke with a tiny groan and began to struggle.

"Do you recognize our guest, Severus?"

Severus reluctantly raised his eyes to Charity's upside-down face. As she revolved to face him she said in a cracked and terrified voice, "Severus! Help me!" He noticed she was weeping openly. Her tears running down her forehead and into her filthy, matted blond hair. He wished he had the luxury of weeping also.

"Ah, yes," he said struggling to maintain the wall. To keep calm. It was more than he could endure. She slowly rotated away.

"And you, Draco?" asked Voldemort as he stroked his snake's snout. Draco shook his head jerkily. He was plainly terrified that Voldemort might associate him with Charity. Now that she was awake he couldn't look at her anymore.

"But you would not have taken her classes," said Voldemort. "For those of you who do not know we are joined her tonight by Miss Charity Burbage who, until recently, taught at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

There were small noises of comprehension around the table. Apparently most of the people there had no idea who this woman was. All they knew was that The Dark Lord hated her so they must hate her too.

"Yes . . . Professor Burbage taught the children of witches and wizards all about Muggles . . . how they are not so different from us . . ."

There were murmers of outrage. One of the Death Eaters spat on the floor.

Snaped wished he was a hero. A hero would leap onto the table wand in hand to rescue the woman he loved. Side by side they would battle against overwhelming evil. There was no way they could have won. They would die together but at least Charity would die knowing that someone loved her.

But Snape was no hero. He had a task to carry out. One that he had to see though to the bitter end if there was any faint hope of defeating Voldemort. The sweet joy of dying with the woman he loved was a luxury he couldn't afford no matter how much he yearned for it.

"Not content with corrupting and polluting the minds of Wizarding children, last week Professor Burbage wrote an impassioned defense of Mudbloods in the _Daily Prophet._ Wizards, she says, must accept these thieves of their knowledge and magic. The dwindling of the purebloods is, says Professor Burbage, a most desireable circumstance. . . She would, given her way, have us mate with them."

There were murmers of disgust and laughter.

"To her, the mixture of magical and muggle blood is not an abomination but something to be encouraged." There was no mistaking the anger and contempt in Voldemort's voice.

Charity's face rotated again in front of him. Now the tears were flowing freely into her hair. "Severus, Severus please! We're friends!"

Snape's face remained impassive. He couldn't even grant the woman he loved the tiny comfort of a sympathetic look. The last thing she would ever see was his cold, cruel indifference. She would truly die alone.

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

She was dead before she even hit the table.

"Dinner, Nagani." Was there no end to this monster's sick evil? If he could he would kill him now but how can you kill a man who cannot die? The body shook and trembled as the foul snake began to swallow her from the feet up. Her empty, dead blue eyes kept staring at him accusingly. He kept his face impassive. All he wanted now was the comfort of weeping. The sweet release of death.

After the conclusion of the meeting Severus turned to leave. The obscenely bloated snake was still resting on the table. All he wanted to do now was leave this hellish place.

"Seee-verrr-uusss!" Bellatrix's sing-song voice mocked him from behind. Couldn't that damned bitch just let him leave!

He wheeled around. "Now what!" his tone was terse and angry. She was standing across the table from him gently caressing the bulge on the snake with a long, black tipped fingernail. A horrible grin on her face.

"I tortured her for hours and hours. Oh, how she screamed! She screamed and screamed until she went hoarse and she still screamed! The agony was unbearable!" She laughed and gave the bulge a little tap.

His fingers twitched, he wouldn't even need his wand. It would be so easy to snap that scrawny little neck with his bare hands. "Even worse than having to stand here and listen to your insane babbling? I have other things to do. Is there a point to this or do you just plan on boring me to death?" Voldemort was still leaning back in his chair watching him. Another damned test. In front of his mental wall; bored contempt. Behind the wall; white hot rage.

She looked at him behind heavily lidded eyes. "I believe that that torture is more than just simple cruelity. It is a fine science, the most noble branch of philososphy." She had her wand out and was examining it as if for the first time. "Everybody wears a mask, they have a front that they show the world. They never show their true self to anybody. I believe that through prolonged torture you can peel away the layers one by one until that true self is revealed. It is the only way to find out who a person really is."

"I can't wait to hear what you found." Snape said in a bored tone of voice that indicated that he didn't really give a crap what she found.

"When I peeled away all the layers, when I ripped away everything she had. When I found her true self. What I found was you!"

"Any time you want to find me, you know where to look."

"When Professor Burbage was reduced to a half-crazed quivering wreck, she spoke about you Severus Snape." She caressed the wand like a lover. "She loved you Severus, she also hated you. Love and hate mingled together make quite a delicious cocktail." She laughed then stared at Severus intently. "She tried to convince me that you were working for Dumbledore, that the two of you conspired to fake his death, that Dumbledore is still alive and in hiding, that you are a spy, that I should torture you to get to the truth! What do you say about that?"

"I would say that someone under torture would say anything to make it stop." Snape's tone remained bored but behind the wall the turmoil increased. This was getting a little too close to the truth. "The Dark Lord is convinced that Dumbledore is dead, are you saying that he's a fool?"

Bellatrix's eyes widened in terror as she made a sideways glance and the creature lounging in the chair apparently ignoring them. "Of course not! I'm just telling you what she said!"

"And you've done so, is that all?" He turned to leave.

"Just one more thing, at the end when she was about to die she turned toward you for help. She called you her friend."

"As did Dumbledore, it did neither of them any good. The Dark Lord ordered me to befriend possible members of the Order. No doubt she took my gestures more seriously than she should have."

Bellatrix smiled at him. "I was just wondering, if I should torture you, strip away your layers, reveal your true self. What would I find?"

Snape drew his wand. "You're welcome to try!" he growled.

"Now, now, children, play nice." Voldemort spoke from his chair.

Snaped turned to him, gave a deep bow, and left the room.

Spinner's End

Snape entered his home alone. He made a routine check to make sure all the defensive spells were still in place. They were still there. He could finally relax the iron grip that he had on his emotions.

The house was empty. He once fantasized about sharing it with Charity. He had heard the envy in her voice when she spoke about Molly Weasley. She had craved children and he would have given her anything she wanted.

He screamed and kicked over a small end table. It went flying across the room. It wasn't nearly damaged enough to satisfy him so he picked it up and smashed it to kindling against the wall. He gave a primordial wail then slumped down upon his knees weeping. It was too much! How much longer could he go on! Everyone he loved, died. Everthing he touched turned to shit! This mad scheme of Dumbledore's couldn't possibly work. But it was the only slim hope he had. Lily, Albus, Charity, all dead because of him! How many more would have to die! He curled up on the floor into a fetal position, his body wracked with sobbing. In a few hours he would walk out the front door. His walls up, his mask in place as if nothing was wrong. But Bellatrix was right. Prolonged torture had stripped away all the layers he presented to the world. Right now he was his true self.


	7. No Greater Love

**No Place For Charity**

**Chapter 7**

**No Greater Love**

* * *

><p><strong>May 1998<strong>

**The Shrieking Shack**

Severus stood impatiently before Voldemort. He sensed that tonight was the night. Hogwarts was under siege. The Dark Lord had placed his damned snake inside a starry sphere of protection. He must talk to the Potter boy tonight or all Albus's plans would fail. He didn't place much faith in the scheme under the best of circumstances but it was the only chance they had. But how do you tell a boy that he has to die? Now Voldemort had summoned him here for a private talk when he had to find the boy. He hoped this wouldn't take too long.

"My Lord—let me got to the boy—"

"All this long night, when I am on the brink of victory, I have sat here." Voldemort said in a raspy whisper, "wondering, wondering, why the Elder Wand refuses to be what it ought to be, refuses to perform as legend says it must perform for its rightful owner . . . and I think I have the answer."

Snape didn't speak as terror rose in his gut. He wasn't afraid of death, he was afraid of failure. He would happily go to Hell as long as he could drag Voldemort's screaming shred of a soul down into the pit with him. But unless he found the boy first he would die in vain.

"Perhaps you already know it? You are a clever man, after all, Severus. You have been a good and faithful servant, and I regret what must happen."

"My Lord—"

"The Elder Wand cannot serve me properly, Severus, because I am not its true master. The Elder Wand belongs to the wizard who killed its last owner. You killed Albus Dumbledore. While you live, Severus, the Elder Wand cannot be truly mine."

"My Lord!" Even as he raised his wand, Severus recognized the futility of the gesture, there was no possible way he could kill Voldemort.

"It cannot be any other way," Voldemort said. "I must master the wand, Severus. "Master the wand and I master Potter at last."

Voldemort sweeped his wand as Severus braced for whatever spell was coming. For a split second he thought the spell had failed until he saw the sphere with Nagani rolling through the air toward him. He screamed as it engulfed him and the snake bit deeply into his neck. A part of him wanted to laugh. Voldemort still considered him a friend. He never directly killed his friends but let others do his dirty work. How pathetic.

His knees gave way and he collapsed on the floor. Nagani's poison coursed like fire though his veins.

"I regret it." Voldemort said coldly. He turned and left the room with the snake.

Severus grasped his throat trying to stop the flow of blood. He could barely move. He could feel himself dying. A failure.

There was the sound of fluttering cloth and Harry Potter suddenly appeared in front of him. No hate in his eyes, only something akin to pity. There was still a chance. Only . . . seconds . . . left. Harry bent over him and Severus grabbed his robe and pulled him close.

"Take . . . it . . . Take . . . it . . ."

With his last effort Severus forced his memories out. Harry collected them with his wand and placed them into a vial.

His grip was weakening, Severus looked for the last time into his eyes. So green, like Lily's. "Look . . . at . . . me . . ." he whispered. The boy's face faded into black. His last thoughts were of Lily and Charity. The two women he loved. The two women he betrayed.

Snape was lying face down on cracked concrete. There was mist all around him. The first thing he figured out was that he was naked. Maybe he wasn't dead after all. Perhaps Hermione had come up with a anti-venom potion. He doubted Harry ever could in spite of what Slughorn had to say. The odd thing was, he felt no pain. Not just the snake bite but the little things like the slight twinge he always felt in his left knee. The sore feet from running around on them all night. He groped around for his wand but couldn't find it. And why was he naked?

"_I need some clothes." _He thought and some green robes appeared next to him. _"Green? I've never worn green in my life!" _The last thing he had seen were Harry's green eyes, so much like Lily's. "Black!" he said out loud. "If I'm to meet my judgement, it will be as I lived!" The robes turned black. Whoever was running this place, at least he's accomodating.

As he put them on he looked around. He was apparently at some old fashioned airport, complete with hangers, control tower, beacon, windsock and a very old propellor driven airliner of some kind. No people or life on any kind. Not even insects. There were no muggle airports anywhere near Hogwarts. Where exactly was he? If this was Heaven then he was less than impressed. If it was Hell then he was still less than impressed.

He held out his hand. "Wand!" No wand appeared. At least it was worth a try. He wandered over to a telephone next to a hanger and picked up the reciever. As he expected, the line was dead.

A small clatter and a flicker of movement from the corner of his eye. He turned his head toward the hanger across the tarmac but saw nothing. Perhaps he wasn't as alone as he thought. He stepped over to a metal toolbox resting on a metal barrel and opened it. A good heavy wrench was soon tightly gripped in his hand. He would much rather have his wand but it'll do in a pinch.

He slid behind a 1930's era fuel truck and peeped around the corner. He saw nothing but he thought he heard footsteps. He decided to go around the back side of the hanger and come up behind whoever was there. When he got behind it he found himself back on the same tarmac just across from where he was earlier. This place was like a moebis strip, travel in a straight line in any direction and you always end up where you began. And this particular universe wasn't all that big.

It was time to start thinking four dimensionaly, if he traveled off the grid at this point he should be able to come up behind the point where the noise came from. He gave a flamboyant flap of his cape as he headed to the point he had calculated.

A few minutes later he loomed over a crouched figure in a grey dress crouched behind some oil barrels. She was clutching a large monkey wrench in a sweaty fist.

"Put it down, Charity, I won't hurt you."

Charity jumped and the monkey wrench clattered on the concrete. "Severus! It's you! I saw you going . . ."

"I meant you to see me and I doubled back. I figured you knew the rules of this place better than I did."

"So you're dead. Was it HIM?"

"Voldemort?" She cringed. "Don't fear his name. He has no power in this place."

"It's all my fault!" Tears were flowing down her face. "I murdered you! I told them you were a spy! I hated you. I wanted them to kill you!"

"You didn't murder me, he didn't believe you and he killed me over something entirely different, you were closer to the truth than you thought. I was a spy working for Dumbledore. You were meant to hate me. Everyone was."

"You don't understand! A part of me wanted it to be true! I hoped it was true! But I couldn't take the torture anymore! It was unrelenting! The constant questions! The Crucio curse! It seemed to go on forever! I would have told them anything to make them stop but they never did! They broke me! I betrayed you! I betrayed everyone! I'm so ashamed!"

Severus sat next to her and put his arms around her pulling her to his shoulder. He felt her body shake against him as she was sobbing. "It's alright, nobody could have held up under that much torture, anyone would have broken."

"You wouldn't have broken."

"No, I wouldn't have."

She started making a grunting noise as her body kept shaking. It took him a moment to realize that she was laughing through her tears. "Oh Severus, you're a total jerk! You know that don't you?"

"I am who I am. I make no appologies."

"No, really, it's alright! Dying doesn't give you a sudden personality transplant. We both still have the same hangups we had in life. I've always fallen for the jerks. It was my curse in life." She looked up at him with her tear streaked face. "I've always known that you weren't a very nice man. But you've always been a very good man, and I betrayed you."

"I watched you die, I didn't lift a finger to help you."

"Under the spreading chestnut tree,

I sold you and you sold me.

There lie they, and here lie we.

Under the spreading chestnut tree."

Snape's brow furrowed. "What was that?"

"A line from a book I read once. We can start over. Voldemort . . ." she said the name with great effort, "ruined our lives. Let's not let him ruin us now. I love you Severus Snape. I want to stay with you if you let me."

He kissed her forehead. "I love you." He realized that this was the first time he had ever said those three words to anybody. "I love you Charity." He leaned back against the oil drums with Charity nestled against his side. "So where the hell are we?"

"I don't know, I think I created this place with my mind."

"This dump? Couldn't you have come up with anything better?"

"I don't think this is either Heaven or Hell, we're between two worlds. A transitional place. Maybe it's Purgertory. I created this from the final scene of a movie called Casablanca. I thought I was supposed to get on the plane but I couldn't. Not with a heart full of hatred. I've been here so long."

"I don't think that plane will take me. I wasn't exactly a saint."

"Yes you can. 'There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends.' You've done that. You gave up your life for your friends. Not just your death but your whole life. You gave up everything; happiness, love, friendship, piece of mind, your good name. You allowed yourself to be hated by everybody. You sacrificed your whole life for others. I think you can move on to a better place."

"I think she's right." Snapes head jerked up as Albus Dumbledore walked out of the mist.

Severus and Charity scrambled to their feet. "Professor Dumbledore, I didn't expect to see you here!" Charity sputtered.

"I didn't expect it either." Dumbledore smiled looking around, "So where exactly is here?"

"An airport from the late 1930's."

Dumbledore looked around curiously "Oh really?" He then looked at Snape. "So Severus, I trust your mission was successful?"

Snape nodded. "Harry Potter knows what is expected of him. He will do it. He has his mother's courage."

Dumbledore smiled. "And his fathers." The engines on the aircraft suddenly sputtered to life and began a steady roar. "I see no reason for you to linger, the two of you can move on now."

Snape looked at the aircraft. "To death."

Albus shook his head. "To life! You'll be more alive there than you ever were on earth. The two of you will have a whole new world to explore together."

The three of them approached the plane. Snape looked at it dubiously. "So what is it?"

"A DC3," Charity answered, "It's not the plane from the movie but I happen to like DC3's."

"How does it work?"

Charity ran her hand on the left wingtip. "Because of the way the wing is shaped, air moving across it at high speed creates a low pressure area on the top of the wing. High pressure air on the bottom of the wing pushes it up and makes it fly."

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of!"

"Trust me, it'll work." She took his hand and led him to the stairway leading up to the open door.

Snape paused and looked back at Dumbledore. "Albus, are you coming with us?"

Albus shook his head. "No, I've got one more task I have to do. I'll be along shortly."

Snape made a short bow. "Then I'll see you on the other side."

Holding Charity's small hand in his, Severus followed her up the stairs. A part of him would always love Lily but if he met her on the other side he would greet her as a friend, not a lover. She was Lilly Potter now and will remain so forever. His heart now belonged to Charity. He also felt a brief wave of pity, not for Lord Voldemort but for Tom Riddle. A young boy who feared death and wanted to live forever. A young man who had never known happiness or love. Without his love for Lily it would have been so easy for Severus to have gone down the same path. Tom really had no clue what eternal life was. Soon his ragged shred of a soul would learn just how long forever was.

Albus watched them enter the aircraft then the door shut and the stairway faded away into mist. He kept watching as the engines roared to life and the DC3 sped down the airstrip and took off into the mist. The airport then faded into mist and he turned. The boy should be here shortly.

The End


End file.
